Went to the doctors today to collect my latest PSA result. A sickening feeling as I walked into the surgery, but a feeling that I am familiar with now, and one that I wonder if I'll ever get used to? I had my first PSA after surgery about a month ago, and was delighted to find it at .02, as low as it really can be detected. If this result was the same then that would be great. The receptionist looked at the screen and seemed worried. I asked what was wrong and she said that she couldn't find it. Of course I was thinking that she was thinking how bad it looked; the same old mind tricks that you do on yourself time after time. She then said that she had found it, but needed to ask a doctor something and swiftly disappeared. Again I was struck with the fear of wondering why she needed to see a doctor. When she came back she just, "That's fine", popped the result in an envelope and gave it to me. I walked some way down the corridor and sat down to open it. It was a similar feeling when you get that letter from the football pools, the familiar envelope, when you know it's a win, but you bet yourself it's only £3.50 and it usually is! Well I opened it, and it was as if it was £100,000...

                                                    .03

Is that good? Well, yes, it's far better than 0.04 or 0.05 and sure as hell better than 3.8!!! It has increased from 0.02 to 0.03 but I am told that there are as much as 0.02 variations in different labs. If the next one is .03 or .02 then I will be delighted, but if we creep up to 0.05 then I can see radiotherapy in the distance. But wow, that's not bad to have it there as an option at this stage, so all in all......

                                     I am bloody delighted!